Today has been the hardest day ever. Been keeping my head above the water but the water’s coming in.
Has felt like I’m drowning and there is no one here.
Everything is falling to pieces.
I was reminded tonight as the storm settled for a while, that exactly this time or month 10 years ago I was in the darkest place of my life.
It was a bit of reassurance, like I got through that..how did I do that?
There has been such dreaded leftovers, sleeping down there in my bones. And I’m so tired of these destructive voices breaking apart all the little places that I try to build refuge for myself.
I don’t know how or where to start excavating.